Each year at Thanksgiving, our church does a special worship service called "He Has Been Good." We come together to show our thankfulness to God for the things he has done for us this year. During the service, in addition to a toy drive for underprivileged families, different church members are highlighted to share the story of how God has been good to them this year.
Here is the video that was shown this past Sunday night of our family's adoption journey. Props to our church media staff, especially Chad Conger and Keith Holloway, for their fantastic work.
Great Clips at Glenbrook in Hendersonville has graciously chosen to donate a portion of their proceeds from every haircut this Saturday (November 14th) to our post-adoption expenses!
(What are post-adoption expenses, you ask? Well, although the Ethiopian courts granted us custody of Ansley and Karis, they are here in the U.S. on a Green Card, as permanent residents. But they are not U.S. Citizens. And while the US government recognizes our official custody of them, we have to "re-adopt" them through a US court. This is just a formality, but it is what gives them the ability to apply for a Social Security Card and obtain American birth certificates, etc. The court costs and attorney fees are around $1000.)
Come by, get your haircut -- there will be appearances by the Grinch and Suds (the mascot shaped like a shampoo bottle), from 9-3.
ALL CHILDREN 10 AND UNDER WILL RECEIVE A TREAT BAG WITH SPECIALLY PRICED $8.99 HAIRCUT!!!!
Thanks to Megan at Great Clips for setting this up for us!
The Glenbrook Shopping Center is off of Exit 6 (New Shackle Island Rd) on Vietnam Veteran's Memorial Blvd in Hendersonville. The Great Clips is across the parking lot from Target, next to Wolf Camera.
From the very beginning of our adoption journey, we have been covered in prayer. Our church family and friends have prayed us through the application process, prayed us through the fundraising adventures, and prayed us safely home from Ethiopia with Ansley and Karis.
Since then, life has taken over. Our blog posts got fewer and further between. The adoption was complete. Right? From the activity on our blog, most would answer, "Right. The Eglys are home now. Everything is just perfect. Sweet little fairy-tale ending. Two orphans united with their forever family. Check."
A friend of mine (Tim Goonan) said it best this morning. He said so much focus goes on the front end of adoption, but that's only a matter of months. Once the adoption is complete you wake up one morning and realize that the second phase of adoption lasts FOREVER. Like when you've rented an apartment your entire life and then you buy a home. You're excited to get a riding lawn mower and cut the grass, until you realize you gotta cut it every week for the rest of your life!
It's overwhelming. Thinking about his words, I want to carry the analogy further ... I thought, the first time you mow your new yard, you realize it's full of ruts and rocks and roots. It's bumpy. How did I not see that when I looked at the grass the first time? It looked so smooth and lush! Now I'm thinking about bringing in a bobcat and completely uprooting the whole lawn! The realization that there are going to be hours and hours of digging up rocks, smoothing out the rough places, raking, aerating, finding more rocks, busting them up, and hauling them off. It's overwhelming. It's exhausting.
We were fooled those first three months by how well our girls were adjusting. The grass looked green. We are not going to have all those issues that other adoptive families have. God has spared us. This is going to be easier than we expected.
Then ... BAM!! My mower just hit a boulder. It broke my blade. It bent my housing. It cracked my frame. And upon closer inspection, THE WHOLE YARD IS A ROCK PIT!!
Our girls are hurting. We knew they would be. But we had no idea how badly. The pain runs deep. It affects EVERYTHING they do. Especially Ansley. Everyone she has ever trusted in her 5 1/2 years on this planet has hurt her. Why would we be any different? Why should she attach to us? It's almost as if her life's ambition is to keep people at an arm's length ... or further. It's self-preservation. It's all she knows. And it's NOT HER FAULT.
As Shelley wrote in the previous post, we have experienced a darkness these past few days like none other. Things were so bad we were on the verge of feeling completely hopeless. For the first time in my life I more clearly felt the presence of the Enemy in my home than I did the presence of the Lord. I felt within myself the capacity to do things and say things that I am ashamed to admit and that I never thought I could be capable of. It scared the Hell out of me. Literally. (Sorry if that offends you. There's no other way to say it.)
And that's when Shelley called upon you to pray. And pray you did.
Almost overnight we felt the confidence of Hope and the presence of the Lord. Ansley's demeanor has taken a significant turn for the better. There is still a long way to go, but considering where we were, this is nothing short of miraculous.
This is a spiritual battle. Duh! Of course it is! Adoption is the analogy Scripture uses for our salvation more than any other and it is the picture of God's grace here on this earth. The enemy does not want adoptions to be successful.
And just like how a person coming to know Christ is saved but not instantly sanctified, so is an adopted orphan rescued but not instantly healed of all the hurt and pain. Sanctification takes a lifetime of walking with the Lord and learning to listen to Him. Healing our hurting children is likewise going to take a lifetime of love and acceptance and having people like you personally carry them to the Throne of God in prayer.
Our family is also benefiting greatly by counseling from The Babb Center -- an awesome Christian counseling center here in Hendersonville. I HIGHLY recommend it.
Please keep praying. It's working. But we have a long way to go. And one day, we'll invite you over to walk through our lush, green lawn that your prayers are currently smoothing, sewing, cultivating, aerating, and fertilizing. Heck ... we might even let you mow if you want.
I have wanted to write something for a couple of weeks now. I have wanted it to be something positive and inspiring.
I want to be honest though, and positive and inspiring is just not where I am right now.
If you have been around us for a few minutes lately you know that our family is really struggling.
We need your prayers.
We feel that Satan has a great presence in our home and it is downright scary. He has brought us to an all time low point. Ansley is not attaching well and helping her feels impossible. Karis and Mallory have been sick. The medical/dental bills are really piling up, along with the re-adoption costs. We are feeling very overwhelmed with the needs of our three girls.
Please pray for the darkness to lift from our home. Please pray that Jesus' life, light, peace and spirit will fill the walls and rooms of our home and our bodies. Please pray for Ansley's heart to heal- for us to know how to help her even when we are exhausted from helping her. Please pray for our weary souls, hearts and minds. Please pray for me and Jason to find time every day to let God speak to us through his Word. Please pray for our girls to enjoy being with each other and for the offenses to be forgiven. Please pray that our marriage would remain solid and that we would take time to minister to each other. Please pray for God to continue to meet our financial needs as He has done so many times before.
We are very grateful for your prayers. We will try and do better with our updates. If you can, please leave a comment-it will really encourage us to know who is praying. Thank you community for your love and patience-
Hey everyone! Life is getting more and more crazy. Why did we think it would be crazier at the beginning and gradually get easier? It is the just the opposite. Life was less crazy right after we got home than it is now. The going from one child to three is sinking in now- three times the mess, three times the laundry, and three times the discipline makes us really really tired. But three times the laughter, three times the "thank you for family", three times the giggles, and three times the smiles is totally worth it! We know that God has called us to this and we will persevere and get to a new sense of "normal" if there is such a thing in our family. God is very much at work in our girls' hearts and we are very grateful for His quiet reminders that He is here amongst the chaos singing over us daily, quieting us with His love.
Please continue to pray for our girls as they take in so many new things, meet new challenges and learn how to trust us. Love to you all!
Please pray for us this week. We are leading a mission team of 22 college students and 20Somethings in Missoula, Montana. We are having an awesome time and great things are being accomplished for the Kingdom.
Hey everyone. I want to make you aware of an upcoming event that is well worth your time and possibly even may be life-changing for you.
Saturday, August 8th, at the Gaylord Springs Golf Club in Nashville, Tom Davis (author of Red Lettersand Fields of the Fatherless) will be speaking about the worldwide orphan crisis. Singer/songwriter Britt Nicole (Set the World on Fire) will be leading worship. It is truly going to be an awesome event.
It's a little personal for us, as well. The proceeds for the night's event go to support the Transition Home where Ansley and Karis lived before we came to get them. This Transition Home was such a Godsend and, in light of some recent things A & K have told us in the past few days, most likely saved their lives. The America World Transitional Home in AddisAbaba truly is one of the few bright lights in a very, very dark place.
Please click on the picture and visit the website below for more information about this awesome event, or let me know if you have any questions.
Our girls love water. Whether its playing in it in the plastic backyard pool, washing in it in the bathtub, or drinking it from their sippy cup, they love it. You can tell this from the video below, but we didn't realize how much they appreciate clean water until two nights ago.
As our girls are learning more and more English, they are beginning to tell us lots of stories. This is awesome because, for the first time, we are beginning to learn about their lives, who they are, and where they came from.
I was laying on our bed tickling Ansley and Karis (a pretty common occurrence) and Karis asked me if we were going to go swimming the next day. I told her I didn't think so and then I saw her get "that look" where I know she's trying to think of words to tell me something important. Here's what she said (I can't do it justice without the body language that went along with it ...)
"Daddy, in Africa [pronounced uhFREEkuh] ... no water."
I was stunned. I asked, "What do you mean, Karis?"
She went on, "Ansley. Karis. No play water. Karis [makes splashing movements with her arms onto her face] ... Nanny say, 'NO NO NO, Befe!!!' [shows me that the nanny spanked her on the arm.] 'NO play water!! NO NO Befe!!' "
Ansley was nodding her head up and down in as if to validate what Karis was saying, saying "Yes, yes, Daddy! No play water!!"
Karis went on: "No play water. No drink. No bath in uhFREEkuh." She was really getting animated at this point.
Wanting to get more out of her, I said, "Why, Karis? Why no water?" Her answer crushed me.
"Water dirty, Daddy. YUCKY! No drink. No play. Water shinty [that's the word for urine], caca [that's poop]. YUCKY, Daddy. YUCKY."
I flashed back to the images and stench burned into my mind forever of Addis Ababa, with the urine and feces all on the sidewalk and streets, and I remembered seeing lots of people in the water of a river that flows through the city and thinking how filthy it looked. And then I imagined my girls playing in and drinking from that same water. I wanted to vomit.
And then what she said next made me realize that she knows how blessed they are now.
"In America, Daddy ... YAYY!! Water drink, water bath, water [she pretended like she was swimming and splashing.] No dirty, Daddy. No yucky."
Wow.
As I reflect on how blessed we are and how thankful I am that my family has clean water, I can't help but think of the millions who do not. Only 22% of the people in Ethiopia have access to safe water. I think of the 6000 children who die every day from water-borne disease. And it is totally preventable. We have the technology and the resources available to provide every person on earth access to clean water. Something we take SO for granted. We just have no idea.
I want to do something.
I got online and found Lifewater International, a Christian organization that seeks to empower communities in developing countries to gain safe water, adequate sanitation, effective hygiene, and the knowledge of Jesus’ love -- the Living Water. Check them out at http://www.lifewater.org/ . They have an informative fact sheet on their programs in Ethiopia -- here. If you feel so led, you can donate to their cause online -- here.
If this post has stirred your heart, I encourage you to make a donation in honor of Ansley and Karis. There is a place on the form for comments where you can do that. I want them to know that their story helped other people in their home country get clean water. In fact, if you will let me know that you did that, we will send you one of our adoption shirts for free.
Or, if you want to know how you can help provide an orphan child clean water for life by giving them a forever family, visit the Orphan's Ticket Home website, and consider attending their Nashville Gala to be held at Gaylord Springs on August 8th.
In the meantime, watch this video of our girls enjoying the blessing of clean water, taking a bath for the first time in America, and playing in the kiddy pool for the first time. Give thanks to God for His provision, and for Jesus -- the Living Water.
Now that we are home with Ansley and Karis, the adventures are over and the blogging will end, right?
Hardly.
We are quickly learning that our adventures are just beginning and we would love for you to continue following our journey as we share those adventures here on this blog. (Hopefully a little more often, now that we are getting into some routines.)
There is so much that goes on around our house now on a given day or week that it will be impossible for us to document everything chronologically. Instead, we just want to give you random snapshots into our family's life with each new post. Our hope is that our story would inspire you or someone else to take the giant leap of faith of opening up your home and your heart to a child (or children) who needs a forever family, so please share with your friends and family.
Adventure #1 is from a few weeks ago when our girls discovered that incredible creation of God known as the Lightning Bug. Oh boy. This is one of my favorites. Get ready to laugh for the entire 6 minutes. And sorry ... to say that no lightning bugs were harmed in the filming of this video would be a big fat lie.
So Jason is the writer and I am the photographer. Since it has been so long since we posted I thought I could at least post some pics. Stay tuned for Jason's post. He has been making a list of the funny goings-on around our house. 8-)
We are doing great! The girls have been in our care for almost 1 month! That is crazy! We are so grateful for all of the help, prayers and support. We couldn't have done this without our awesome community!
I'll leave you with a little taste of their personalities: Mallory has been so nurturing, patient and kind. She has as much teacher in her as Jason and I do ourselves. She has been going through puzzles and cards with the girls teaching them new words. One night last week Ansley Berhane had out a coloring book. She pointed to a page and said to Mallory, "What is?" I helped Mallory understand that she was asking her what was in the picture. Mallory answered Ansley that it was a dog. Ansley Berhane then said, "GO behz!" which means "good job" in amharic. She was copying what Mallory does with her- Mallory is the best big sister for these girls!
Ansley Berhane loves to help. This girl wants to do everything. As soon as she gets out of bed she starts making her bed and Karis Befe's. She is an observer too. She has poured over our albums and practically memorized everyone in the pictures. When Jason's parents came over for the first time she ran to get an album that had their pictures inside. Then she pointed to them in the pictures and in person.
Karis Befe (btw we are still not sure how to spell the her name. we have seen it at least four different ways. Befe is what is on her birth certificate. so for now that is what we are going with.) Anyway, she is our resident comedian. The girl has the greatest little laugh and giggle I have ever heard and it is contagious! She is silly and sweet and loves to be tickled. She keeps us laughing!
Much love!
A little wet fun outside
Posing with silly faces
After catching at least 30 lightning bugs. Poor bugs 8-)
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